Written, Produced & Performed by Kai Straw


Sometimes I think too deep, it's unhealthy
My thoughts get sick and then the docs want to help me
But prescriptions are sicker than the sick that they're helping
They're wealthy, they're just lookin' for cash
Fuck if my character's melting
Yeah, I could probably kill somebody
[Be]cause I'm kinda detached from everybody
Life feels like a dream to my eyeballs
Like it's just projected on a wall
and then my mind's all
thinking it's real, but it's not
it's just collected for my senses
So my soul doesn't get bored between dimensions
And I'm like, Kai, man, that shit's ridiculous
Dwelling won't fix this
Just stop, you dumb ass, and hit this
I think things that make my heart drop
and I can't stop even when I'm not narcotic
I feel high
You're shallow like a top model
Think my thoughts, get your heart swallowed
I'm falling like autumn out of boredom
Trying to fly away but it's a shovel that I'm holding
Digging fuckin' holes
and I felt at home in them
But I want out
[Be]cause I feel like a mouse in my own mind
I'm headless
I'm Icabod
Like a woman cheating when in Lebanon
So motherfucker, fuck off
And stop screaming, yellin' my name
[Be]cause I'm lost and I'm playing fuckin' mind games

So we'll fuck up the planet then say our damn parents did it
[Be]cause man's parasitic, and man can't admit it
But then again, what's the point of the earth?
I'm a corpse in like 20-something years
So fuck it all, I'ma smoke my damn cigarettes
Then kill my lungs
Until my breath's shorter than a gambler's winner streak
Then drink 'till my liver's looking like a raisonette then
Smoke until I'm living like a bitter veteran
It's like a fuckin' obsession
and it's spreads like the condiment section
I don't think I'll ever stop it
Even when I'm feeling fine, my mind just finds
something else to dine on for a while
It's so hard to focus on 'em
But they're bottomless
Hitting bottom is a myth
There's no stopping this fall
An open wound pour the salt
Can't stop trippin' like a chick inside a horror show
A horror show that's never fuckin' ending
With too much pride to be dependent
So it's me alone
And I'll die blaming migraines
But I'm lost, and I'm playing fuckin' mind games

If you took the brain right out of skull
than that would take the life right out of my soul
So that's a proof that life's just chemicals
And that our motherfuckin' life is the end of the road
It seems life's so fast
Death's so slow
Love don't last
So I'm so

Oh, who wants to come and watch my life fade?
It's fun, I'll be playin' fuckin' mind games


from To Pearl Whitney, From Howland Grouse In Loathing, released September 6, 2012



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