Kaleidoscope

by Kai Straw

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04:13
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02:28
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09:13
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credits

released 23 July 2014

Kaleidoscope [EP]
Additional Production:
Raspy Meow (Coca Cola) - raspymeow.bandcamp.com
Zay (American Cotton) - soundcloud.com/zayvsthem
Tadow (Mac Dre Remix) - soundcloud.com/tadowmusic
James The Bear (We'll Be All Right Remix) - soundcloud.com/jtb-43
Brohman (Wasteland Remix) - soundcloud.com/brohman-music

Album artwork by Travis Straw
Photograph by Eddie Dunkin

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Track Name: Nigga
I was sprinting through the woods down in Alabama
Only me and the crickets' violins, my footsteps slammin' violent, like hammers
I'd been runnin' since like four am
sweat pouring from my pores and blood pouring from the sores on my feet,
ignoring it, I would escape the prison I was born in and be free
even if it's through death from pushing my body, we
have to keep running
what's that? the dog's comin'?
C'mon, legs, bring me to my freedom before these dogs snuff it
before these wicked man catch up
and strip my life from me
before the chains are once again
rubbing blisters into my skin
God, they're closing in
fuck my black, charcoaled skin
the curse that wraps my bones
why was I born with this?
Was it my sins?
Am I paying for a life I lived
before this one, and in it, I mimicked my captors wickedness?
Well, could you delay that punishment?
And forgive what I have done in lives before and after this one?
And if it does not reflect some type of karma
I can imagine God is wicked
as those who chase me, and thus my villain
And if I'm caught before the sun is up
know my freedom will be won
and it will echo through millennia
Even if I die,
you heard it right,
you'll know that I'm a fuckin' man
and not your nigga

We chased him through the woods down in Alabama
My dogs barked as they ran toward the smell of the man
He'd ran since about four am
blacker than petroleum
I said he'd blend into the night, into the shadows it afforded him
Where you runnin' to my nigga?
I gave you whips and chains so you'd stay my nigga
And if you escape, you'll remain a nigga
Even if you're free
Society will cage you, nigga
The dogs kept barkin', we're closer
I can hear your feet stompin'
in the dark like the animal you are
you can't run from that
you can't change your stripes
you don't know where your home is and your last name's mine
and any job that you get will be the bile left behind
by us whites and we'll pay you in pennies to be patronizing
Yeah, run into that future
knowing your skin will make your shackles when the world views you as human
and you'll be tethered to the bottom until you find a dye to use
that can turn your skin a fuckin' lighter hue
And now I find myself alone
The dogs, chasing a ghost
I'll come back and find you when the sun's exposed
But if you made it to the river
just know you'll always be a motherfuckin'-

I've dropped some eves from in this brush
I've listened in, now tell me, what have I become
Am I your nigger or the angel, Gabriel
I could have run
But instead I'll choke the life out from your lungs
And yes, your dogs will hear it
And your men will come and find me
but you'll be dead below my feet as I'm hanging from this pine
Like our fates are intertwined
like the day is to the night or the moon is to the ocean's tide

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
I'm goin' home
Track Name: American Cotton
I'm about that progress
I'm about that progress
Never look back, naw, that's
full of mall rats I'm appalled at
full of all whack shit I'm beyond like an action
figure in a pixar flick from the past,
I'm addict
to betterment like a bubblegum package
I'm like the kid doin' crack in the back
of his stepdad's attic, too young to be into that shit, gotta be active
gotta go outside, and I'm yellin' why
I'm trynna build a motherfuckin' empire
So what that I miss a couple calls
it's been a couple months and I said it'd be tomorrow
My brother tells me that I gotta call mom
And I tell 'em that I will when I get a new home for her
and I get dad in a brand new porche
and I get me living in New York
in a flat with a view of the park
and chick with an ass like a peach from my orchard in Florida
That'll be a minute
And I'll see you then and
when I do, you'll give thanks like I'm deity
So leave me be
I'm cooler than a blank * TV screen
or a pool up in jamaica, feet up,
You're telling me it's dog eat dog, yea*, I eat 'em
You're telling me to go out, you're telling me to meet up
I'm telling' you no and I got my reasons
I've got shit to do and what I'm living through
is yeah, a little bit like a prison, dude
but that's what it is, you become what you give
if you give your all, than you gain all of it, yeah

I've been working for a while
the sun was burning bright, now it's behind the moon
I wonder what tomorrow holds
I'll make it out here, I promise you
x2

You're about that progress
I am about that progress
You're about that progress
I was about that progress
You gotta stop that young gun
You gotta go see your mom some
You can dream, don't stop them
but don't go pickin' all their cotton
Said my grandpa to me
I said, naw, who we
gonna be if we don't get our hands all dirty
I'ma work hard, even if it hurts, sorry
I'ma keep it goin' 'till I get a ferrari
And I can't slow like I'm on speed in a bus
on an earth spinnin' around like me when I'm drunk
and I'm feinding to fuck, so
get out of my way
I can't afford to lose an hour a day, I don't
got time for
dumb shit, I don't
got time for
friendship, I don't
got time
for first kisses
'cause if I see opportunity than I'll miss it
See, I'm bleeding for this shit,
it's me with a vision,
it's me with a pot cooking crack in the kitchen
I'ma stop when the cops shoot the back of my spine
or shoot the side of my eyes and hit the nerves behind 'em
or I'm murdered, I'm not stoppable
So I'll probably come back as some type of ghoul
and keep goin' as a poltergeist, I'm a fool,
I guess, for workin' for something that might not come true
but that's what it's all about
Some want love, some want keys to house
as big as a mountain, living amounts to
how you spend your milliseconds and your minutes and hours

I've been working for a while
the sun was burning bright, now it's behind the moon
I wonder what tomorrow holds
I'll make it out here, I promise you
x2
Track Name: Coca Cola
I used to give a fuck until I stopped and dropped the habit
Accepted I was out of place like film to roger rabbit
I'm a pomegranate, I hold within me many seeds
I'm a I'm a hologram of many needs
Everdeen, hold three fingers to my memories
I killed them cause the past is where my laughter finds its enemies
I'm seeing enemies inside of friends inside of homes inside of dens
with so much coke up in their domes they're tellin me, bro, I miss you
They're telling me bro, you're different
They're telling me bro, why are you sober?
You were funny as a drunk, why did you change, why did you grow up
hold up
And who am I to them?
Does respect have value if it's coming from these minor men?
Are lords among the flies respected on Olympus?
Or are Queens among the ants bigger then Kings in our religions?
I'm a beetle in the scope of things, no,
An amoeba in the scope of things,
I'm lesser than the truth inside a poker game
I'm lesser than the proof that a God chose to make
us inside a pot when he was bored as fuck
So I can be crushed, I can break like some pottery does
I'm a human and not so long I'll be dust
so when it's rough, I pull the boots up
and grin like the mud isn't to my chest
I'm so used to drowning I've got gills in my neck
I'm testament to perseverance
I've churned butter instead of drowned in milk
became a cloud when I dropped and spilt
lost the tail when I felt something pulling at my scales
and lived to tell the tale without the tail, I'm still here
I'm a piece of granite, I'm a rock and I'm a man
and I'm a stop when I cannot breathe again and even then
I'm Coca-Cola
Track Name: The American Dream
I'm not just anybody
I'm so special
And anybody should know
I'm so far away
I'm so far away

I stalk the halls
like some lion to some antelope
then a hurried sound and.. another down
another coward screaming out for God himself like he's devout
lying fuck, I'm God with this here gun
and my wrath it reigns like fire from elysium
The greatest anesthetic
is a hate for a people that have earned it in your head
so it's alright
I'll squeeze this trigger tight
Until the pain that I inflict matches the pain within my mind
Until the red combats the beige that paints the walls
or until the screams beat out the bird songs in volume
Until their faces are all misplaced like some Picasso painting
Guernica across the walls, or the sobbing maid
And some will call me horror
But the quiet, the abused and awkward
They will call me martyr

I see ghosts
I see ghosts

I saw my body lose its life and drop
saw the first cop to find me kick my body until the rest told him stop
I saw the moms crying over the phone telling all
their friends that a demon took their daughter with a bullet
Then I saw my name across the news
Along with coffins too
And articles about my brain in journals, psychological
If the dream is fame, I made it
and if it's infamy, than I'm a legend through the pain and if you think it's heinous
blame the news, blame the public loving blood,
and the news reporting murders just to get their ratings up,
then couple that with being taught that success is the attention
of the media and public, and you'll have murderous intentions
then add isolation and intention becomes action
and what was once just a thought, becomes a pistol in my hand
I'm a product of my loneliness
A product of my environment
These streets are all the same, I went insane to prove I'm not like them,
to prove that I'm alive and that I'm someone not a hydrant
going dry from a city lacking lacking fire
And why through hate? Because if life has taught me something
it's that love brings you nothing but pain, betrayal, and fuckin'

I'm not just anybody
I'm so special
And anybody should know
I'm so far away
I'm so far away
Track Name: Wasteland
Yeah, I'm wasted
Chemicals dripping down my spine
I said, yeah, I'm wasted

All I want is sex
or internet pornography
or something violent
anything to battle this monotony
I'm from the land of the vacant
the quarry of the brainless
And my story can be named as
Give me death or get me wasted
Give me freedom or I'll make it
If it's cheap and you're paying
And, no, there are no friends in this
Just a common enemy, boredom, the nemesis
I used to be smart, they told me
And I'd respond, stop bringing up the old me
but my tongue would stumble and could not make words for me
I guess I'm young and I'm dumb
I am an echo of who I did not become
A shadow of someone you thought I was
But this body is fuckin' mine
I poison it, that's fuckin' right
You can blame that on me
And my want to be free
My want to be gone
I want the ugly
I want to throw mud on a masterpiece
I'd like to fuck during mass and see
If I'll be disrupted by lightening

I'm the cost of the sameness
I'm the dazed and the lost and the..

Yeah, I'm wasted
I got this place drippin' down my spine
I said, yeah, I'm wasted
I got this place dripping down my spine
I said, yeah, I'm wasted

Let me strip you naked
And use your body to masturbate with
'Cause high off your skin
I'll forget who I am
Maybe forget who I could have been
I'm always running from something'
I wasted my mind
I'm a frankenstein
I'm what the future and past would look like if they intertwined
I'm you and I combined
I'm everything that I've read online
I'm nobody and everyone
I am God and I am Beelzebub
Oh, this boredom is the plague that got us
I thought, as all this vomit launched and stained the carpet
and the hash was passed and pills we had
were broken down by stomach acid
the grays that filled our lives
would become greens and blues and violets
And my papa is the internet
He taught me almost everything that I know
from my favorite music to sex
to everything that's
under the sun
but I'm too fucked up to see what could be done
to what I could be
the impact I could make upon history
the fact that I could change everything

I'm the cost of the sameness
I'm the dazed and the lost and the..

Yeah, I'm wasted
Yeah, I'm wasted

But I'm in love with my wasted youth
Track Name: We'll Be All Right
I find signs, when you say I'm fine, of breaking down
So when I see you around
I hope I'm like sunshine
And make you wake up

You've got the world on a string
You're smarter than you think, I swear
But there's a war I can see
Brewing in your mind, I can hear the shells

Don't be scared
of the world out there
Don't be scared
of the world outside of your mind
you've got to beat it up

You've got to be a fool
You've got to be a star
You've got to be someone
So dance like it's prom and you're back home with everyone

Where you could be a fool
Where you could be a star
Where you could be someone

I see everything that you could be
I see behind the lies that you tell yourself at night
when you can't sleep
I see beyond the way that you can't seem
to see yourself as a full of worth
You're a valuable person
I used to hate myself
I used to hate my voice and my body
and the way I interacted at parties
I hated the way that I thought
I hated the way that I felt that I wasn't
what people wanted
like I just never belonged
There's this memory of mine
Where I'm laying in a bathroom thinking suicide
Thinking who am I?
I should not survive
It was embarrassing to breathe
I felt pathetic even thinking
This shame just took over my whole being
Where I felt that my life was an insult to those who loved me
But here I am, stronger for it
I'll save a spot for you

I'll be alright
I'll be alright
We'll be alright
We'll be alright

I don't think people understand
I think happiness can be more of a choice
There is hope in the world, I think
It's all about how you look at it
Track Name: Mac Dre (Tadow Remix)
I'm feeling weak and dreary
dealing with the evil near me
dealing with the people here
who think they're real, but really they're delusional
as am I, I rap and I'm white,
and the bay has not got behind an MC of my kind
an MC who talks like he's got the answers to life
I'm an arrogant fuck I guess
Blame my mind
Or blame my mother and father for fuckin'
I care not I'm nothing
And neither are you, honey, so your opinion is invalid to me
I've learned to listen not to those who speak a lot
'cuz dumb shit comes out they're mouth like
their tongue don't teach them nothing
Which it doesn't, you can't learn while you speakin'
So stop talking like the world wants all that stupidity leaking through your teeth
and over your tounge like a stream of dumb
And I keep believing them
I want to trust so bad, I eat lies like C-vitamins
Ahh, see vitamins,
I'm sick, if you'll survive this
you've gotta eat your veggies and do your ecsericises
Let's begin with a lesson
Do you only listen to one genre?
If you do, you're a closed minded dumb fuck and should be shot
Another question
Do you aspire to violence?
If so, I'm gonna stab you five times to be ironic, and that's a promise
I'm a prophet, fuck you if you say I'm not that,
I can be whatever the fuck I want, and I see that you are still watching
So get off me
So get off me
So get off me

I'm the most talented rapper the bay has even seen
after Mac Dre, he appeared to me in a dream
and said, why after my death the whole bay just tried to copy me,
tried to make money off my body while I was rotting,
you got it, be you and do what you do that's what I did,
and watch as everybody around you tries to copy it
You'll live forever Kai, I swear it,
Then poof, in the air, he disappeared and wasn't there
like some Jedi shit, damn,
Then I woke up, and saw biggie smalls down at the foot of
my bed, and he said something like,
"Legends aren't made, they're created.
Play the game kid." Then he was gone like he came in,
fast like some magic up in ebeniezers attic,
Then boom
Pac stepped in the room
And he said, "You're a poet, and I know this rap shit's annoying,
just remember hip-hop's a vehicle for the poem,
if we didn't add the boom-bap track we'd be ignored
so embrace it
You're so hip-hop, kid
face it, you know it
Then poof, he was gone, and I wrote this